"Loneliness is just the feeling of incompleteness..."

She selects a strong tree as a metaphor. She admits that the strongs tree symbolizes the fact that although she is aging, she is still standing and also that her way of life is like that of a strong tree as well. She is an 89-year-old retired English teacher. She describes and interprets loneliness as, "it is just the feeling of incompleteness and a feeling of missing a significant other." Besides experiencing the feeling of incompleteness due to the missing of her significant other, she also admits sadness does exist in her life. She explains, "Sadness surfaces once awhile."

"It ls a sinking kind of feeling...

"Well, it can be very lonely, it can be very lonely. I remember coming back from conference after my husband had died and just the sound of the suitcase and my briefcase in the empty house was just chilling."

She is a 69 year old woman. She selects the interlocking circles/chains as a metaphor of her life. Her explanation of the "interlocking circles" metaphor relates to being consiered as such as an important part of each aspect of her life. The need to be supported, and the circumstance of being connected are both key issues for her as she fears becoming entagled to the point of detachment and misdirection.

When she describes loneliness and emptiness, she states, "it's a sinking kind of feeling like...I feel lonely, feeling lonely at night." She expressess, "it's (loneliness) an empty feeling like being alone and abandoned."

"Sunset symbolizes the beauty of life."

"If you feel lonely, then you feel sad. You miss your parents, you miss your sisters, you miss you brothers, and you miss your brother that you lost recently. It makes you almost start crying. That's very seldom. that's once in a great while that it happens, see. That's way I feel."

This 92 year old man selects the sunset to symbolize the beauty of life. The reason for this symbolism is that he feels that the whole concept of the sun setting centers around God creating the world.

"The only part is when you think of your mother and your father and your sisters and your brothers that are gone. then the feling of loneliness comes back and then you might shed maybe a tear or two because they are not there."

"the powerful Words save her....

Here is an incident that had happened to an elderly woman when she was about to be robbed. Listen to what she was sharing, "the powerful Words save her..."
Conquer evil with GOOD!....Watch this clip...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDmp967UMds

...Aging is everywhere around the world....

It is always sad to see how elderly individual been treated by society. Are we loving and caring toward the elderly? Take this opportunity to watch this clip..., Are those elderly individuals feeling lonely?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=junU1PZyiQo&feature=related

Diverstity + Unity = Harmony

Encouraging these precious members to express themselves, Focusing on creating an importance, to achieve a special calmness

The precious hands....

First, from the heart, The hands that create the sensitive and provocative beats, then from the brain.

Peacefulness of mind, heart spirit, body and soul...

The preparation for creating a perfect harmony. The centering of the mind, heart, spirit, body and soul.

Heart-Beats Group

Sensitive and unique in itself...this is the group, Wonderful harmony

No nursing home...

Just for our daily reflection...

Is nursing home the final "place" for our aging parents?
How do we empathize the pain, sadness, confusion, "anger" and many other negative emotions of our aging parents when they heard that they will be leaving their "beloved home?"

Click this link...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfeksGcUvrs&feature=related

"Quotes from those who participated and who heard about the Rhythmic Hand-drumming (8/20/08, 3.00PM)."

A 88 year old woman, "I enjoyed it and it was relaxing."
A man in his 80s, "It was phenomenal, just enjoyed the sound!"
A 99 year old woman, "I played the little drum, it was wonderful."
"I could not believe what I have seen yesterday," said a caregiver.

"When are we going to have that drumming again?", asked by a 83 yearold woman.
"It made me very peaceful yesterday as I beat the drum", a 88 year old woman.
"What a joy, I heard they all enjoyed, I hope to make it next time.", a supevisor in the center.
A 103 year old, "I was able to hold the egg-shaker."
A woman in the 80s said, "the mother drum- "Dun-Dun" was very inspiring, the sound of very beautiful."

..the beats of "tick-tick, dun-dun, cling-cling, tak-tak, sah-sah"

A 99 year old woman was holding the small Japanese drum while waiting for the others to join her. About 2.55 PM the gathering room was full of our beloved seniors. There were about 25 persons in the gathering room. Praise God for them.

The 99 year old woman asked, "how should I beat the drum?" Someone sitting next to her (she is about 85 years) old replied, "just beat according to your feeling inside." The sound started, "tak-tak-tak-tak" and slowly the big mother drum started to give the bass beat, "dun-dun-dun", then followed by the djembe drummers who all were in their 80's, with this sound, "pak-tak-pak-pak-tak-pak." Then slowly a shy 103 year old woman shook her egg shaker, and it produced a wonderful melody, "sak-sak-sak". In addition to all these, there were two women in their early 90's with the frame drums..."bub...bubu...bu..." the sound of the bell, cling, cling, cling produced by two women in their 80's too. The sound of the maracas, sah-sah-sah....

Finally the whole room was sounding like a wonderful and peaceful ambience of HARMONY. "Tak-tak-tak, dun-dun-dun, pak, tak, pak, sak, sak, sak, bub-bubu-bu...cling, cling, cling, sah, sah, sah "
What a wonderful, peaceful beat they produced from their hearts. They were given the opportunity to express emotions in a safe and supportive environment.

Finally, December 19, 2007, I defended my dissertation at the University of Rochester, New York.

Abstract
Loneliness is a pervasive human experience. It is a subjective experience that is influenced by one’s personality and situational variables. Loneliness has been recognized as a public health problem that requires the attention of clinicians and researchers both as a condition in itself and its relationship to other conditions.
The study examined and generated an in-depth understanding of loneliness as experienced by eight individuals (65 years and above) living independently. A hermeneutic-phenomenological approach was used to describe and interpret the meaning of loneliness in the lived experience of elderly individuals. These interpretations were made possible through the support of the incidental themes, which were formulated by the participants’ descriptions of their experiences of loneliness. Through interpretation, four themes emerged from explanations of how the elderly individuals interpreted loneliness. First, the participants experienced the existence of a painful void. Second, the participants experienced a state of being overwhelmed with work and emotion. Third, participants experienced a state of emotional pain. Fourth, the participants experienced a state of no direction.
These findings affirmed that negative feelings were associated with loneliness according to the participants’ descriptions. Understanding the common themes and meanings of the lived experience of these elderly individuals provides an effective base for the therapeutic relationship between counselor and the elder. The strengths and limitations of the study, and significant implications of the findings and future research, practice and education in counseling, were identified.

"Next month, I will be 90 years old."

With a sweet smile, she shared to the group, "next month, I will be 90 years old." I could not even recall 20 years ago, "how did I look at God in my spiritual life?"
"That's A BLESSING," a 78 year old woman responded to her.
It is a joy to hear, how someone rejoices with other person who will be reaching 90 years old. This is really the visibility of good net-working/relationship amongst the elderly population.

"It hard to be old, who listen to me now?"

"It is hard to be old, who listen to me now?" This is a statement stated by a 92 year old man this morning. He further said, "wait until you reach my age."
Yes, it is really difficult as a person looks at himself/herself each day, realizes that nobody listens to him or her anymore.