Heart-Beats Group

Sensitive and unique in itself...this is the group, Wonderful harmony

No nursing home...

Just for our daily reflection...

Is nursing home the final "place" for our aging parents?
How do we empathize the pain, sadness, confusion, "anger" and many other negative emotions of our aging parents when they heard that they will be leaving their "beloved home?"

Click this link...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfeksGcUvrs&feature=related

"Quotes from those who participated and who heard about the Rhythmic Hand-drumming (8/20/08, 3.00PM)."

A 88 year old woman, "I enjoyed it and it was relaxing."
A man in his 80s, "It was phenomenal, just enjoyed the sound!"
A 99 year old woman, "I played the little drum, it was wonderful."
"I could not believe what I have seen yesterday," said a caregiver.

"When are we going to have that drumming again?", asked by a 83 yearold woman.
"It made me very peaceful yesterday as I beat the drum", a 88 year old woman.
"What a joy, I heard they all enjoyed, I hope to make it next time.", a supevisor in the center.
A 103 year old, "I was able to hold the egg-shaker."
A woman in the 80s said, "the mother drum- "Dun-Dun" was very inspiring, the sound of very beautiful."

..the beats of "tick-tick, dun-dun, cling-cling, tak-tak, sah-sah"

A 99 year old woman was holding the small Japanese drum while waiting for the others to join her. About 2.55 PM the gathering room was full of our beloved seniors. There were about 25 persons in the gathering room. Praise God for them.

The 99 year old woman asked, "how should I beat the drum?" Someone sitting next to her (she is about 85 years) old replied, "just beat according to your feeling inside." The sound started, "tak-tak-tak-tak" and slowly the big mother drum started to give the bass beat, "dun-dun-dun", then followed by the djembe drummers who all were in their 80's, with this sound, "pak-tak-pak-pak-tak-pak." Then slowly a shy 103 year old woman shook her egg shaker, and it produced a wonderful melody, "sak-sak-sak". In addition to all these, there were two women in their early 90's with the frame drums..."bub...bubu...bu..." the sound of the bell, cling, cling, cling produced by two women in their 80's too. The sound of the maracas, sah-sah-sah....

Finally the whole room was sounding like a wonderful and peaceful ambience of HARMONY. "Tak-tak-tak, dun-dun-dun, pak, tak, pak, sak, sak, sak, bub-bubu-bu...cling, cling, cling, sah, sah, sah "
What a wonderful, peaceful beat they produced from their hearts. They were given the opportunity to express emotions in a safe and supportive environment.

Finally, December 19, 2007, I defended my dissertation at the University of Rochester, New York.

Abstract
Loneliness is a pervasive human experience. It is a subjective experience that is influenced by one’s personality and situational variables. Loneliness has been recognized as a public health problem that requires the attention of clinicians and researchers both as a condition in itself and its relationship to other conditions.
The study examined and generated an in-depth understanding of loneliness as experienced by eight individuals (65 years and above) living independently. A hermeneutic-phenomenological approach was used to describe and interpret the meaning of loneliness in the lived experience of elderly individuals. These interpretations were made possible through the support of the incidental themes, which were formulated by the participants’ descriptions of their experiences of loneliness. Through interpretation, four themes emerged from explanations of how the elderly individuals interpreted loneliness. First, the participants experienced the existence of a painful void. Second, the participants experienced a state of being overwhelmed with work and emotion. Third, participants experienced a state of emotional pain. Fourth, the participants experienced a state of no direction.
These findings affirmed that negative feelings were associated with loneliness according to the participants’ descriptions. Understanding the common themes and meanings of the lived experience of these elderly individuals provides an effective base for the therapeutic relationship between counselor and the elder. The strengths and limitations of the study, and significant implications of the findings and future research, practice and education in counseling, were identified.

"Next month, I will be 90 years old."

With a sweet smile, she shared to the group, "next month, I will be 90 years old." I could not even recall 20 years ago, "how did I look at God in my spiritual life?"
"That's A BLESSING," a 78 year old woman responded to her.
It is a joy to hear, how someone rejoices with other person who will be reaching 90 years old. This is really the visibility of good net-working/relationship amongst the elderly population.

"It hard to be old, who listen to me now?"

"It is hard to be old, who listen to me now?" This is a statement stated by a 92 year old man this morning. He further said, "wait until you reach my age."
Yes, it is really difficult as a person looks at himself/herself each day, realizes that nobody listens to him or her anymore.